I Just Want to Be Myself

I just want to be myself.

I know that there are so many things in my life that I cannot deal with. Sometimes I don't know what I can do and get stuck in it.

It just like a cycle that act day by day. I don't know what it was going, whether it will end or not. As I act many times, just do one thing which don't have the purpose to do. Why I do it, just to demonstrate to others?

It is not worthwhile to do this. I don't what to see myself struggling with those things that I don't like. I want to do this because I like it. I don't need to show it to others, I don't need to wait for the response, I don't need to integrate it into my own world.

What I need to do is just to find my passion and keep going. Nothing can stop me from following my heart. What I like just belongs to me, what I do is just what I want.

Just try to make a difference. If you want to do a thing, just do it by yourself, which is enough. You should not think how to talk it to others, just treat it us a thing that is followed by your heart. This is your own world, and your own experiences, no one knows about it.

As someone said to me before, "Enjoy your own journey". My own journey, which means do it along. I don't need to worry about whether I do great or not. The long trip can't end in a few days, it needs effort, to deal with difficulties, to do your best, just enough.

Now I need to replan for this journey. The past way for me was difficult, but I just need to plan for the next dedicate. I don't need to think of the past which can't be changed. A failure doesn't mean forever. It just reflects for the method, which I used to do and had a poor performance.

I need to change this method. I need to improve my self-discipline, making a better decision, focusing one thing at the same time. What I do now is just like dedifferentiation and redifferentiation. I need efforts to change myself. I need efforts to make a cleaner internal environment.

This is what I want to talk about, to find myself and be myself.